It's The End Of The World As We Know It...Again

  We Will All Go Together When We Go Quote

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  "Nothing lasts forever." I think just about everyone would agree with that. Whether it's a mountain, a mole-hill, a distant star or the Twinky that's been lodged in the back-seat of your dad's Buick since 1967, all things eventually fade and are no more. As impermanent beings, we know and ungracefully accept this fact. One day, the end will come for our friends, our family, our neighbors, our IRS auditors, and even for ourselves. Yes, even the world itself will one day stop spinning on its familiar axis and its property value on the open market will plummet.

  The question is, "When?"

  That's a toughie for a lot of people. On the one hand, according to science, our planet has a good five billion years before the warrantee on our sun runs out. At which point, it will expand to a Red Giant, engulfing Earth and the other inner planets and become far more cost-effective to replace than repair. Especially when one considers that the entire Universe only has a scant ohh, fifteen, sixteen trillion years to expand beyond all conceivable reason before it runs out of steam and starts collapsing back in on itself. Much like the current US economy.

  Science also has shown us that the formation of the Universe was a messy business that left quite a bit of litter behind in the form of giant ice balls and big, nasty rocks; many of which have the unfortunate habit of crashing into our planet uninvited and at highly inconvenient times. A fact the dinosaurs know about only too well... or would have, if there were any still alive... and had brains larger than a throat lozenge... which they're not and they didn't... so, forget I even brought it up. Anyway, the point is, however long our planet has, we as a species might get dusted as early as tomorrow afternoon - somewhere around tea time - should a large enough chunk of space litter choose that moment to come barging rudely into our atmosphere.

  On the other hand, there's God's Wrath: In the theory favored by those whose idea of the Universe is a small, cramped space consisting primarily of ghosties and ghoulies and long-leggedy beasties and things that go bump in the night, the world ought to be coming to a screeching halt any day now. So imminent is the End, in fact, that you may not even get to finish reading this sentence before being either whisked away to glamorous Paradise or plunged into Eternal Damnation. Assuming you're still with me, let me make clear that the supporters of this concept are all absolutely sure that Armageddon is at hand and that we are living in the very Last Days. The signs are all there, they say, the omens and portents are in place, the numbers are right and all the USDA prime grade prophecies are coming true. No doubt about it, the End is seriously nigh. So, ha-ha to everyone who just had their car washed.

  The trouble with this theory is that it's been espoused many, many, many times before. Near-countless times before. Over thousands of years. By millions of people. Ad nauseum. And yet, to state the thuddingly obvious, they've all been wrong. However widespread the belief, however devout the believer, however precise the calculations, however unshakable the certainty, the promise of Doomsday's arrival has remained stubbornly unfulfilled. And yet, here we are in the dim, dun dawn of the 21st century, going at it again like post-modernist Chicken Littles. And if anything, cock-a-doofus-dooming with greater gusto than ever before.

  The why, the what, the where, the when, the who and the how is what this site is all about. This peculiar obsession humans have for watching the clock when we should be enjoying the party has been going on for millennia. And despite an utterly abysmal historical record of failure upon failure and reality's willful refusal to call time-out, it's one that never seems to lose its dubious charm or go mercifully away.

  The following pages contain the most comprehensive collection of apocalyptic prophecies I could compile. Plus, discussion about the various types of Doomsday warnings and obsessions, quirks of the calendar, predictions of apocalypse from around the world and assorted other related stuff. So, if you think you have time to look them over before the Big One hits, the UV rays fry you, the nuclear winter freezes you, the Rapture captures you, the aliens abduct you, the earth opens up to swallow you, the black helicopters come to get you or the dreaded Satanic computer pixies plant a bar code in your forehead and plunge the world into commie-pinko conspiracy chaos, then, by all means, enjoy!


Does Anybody Really Know What Endtime It Is?...Does Anybody Really Care?
Calendrical confusion

Exorcising Poor Last Judgment
The ancient and medieval history of apocalyptic prophecies

A Doom Is A Wish Your Heart Makes
Charismatic doomsayers and their sheep
from the Reformation through the 19th century

If, At First, You Don't Succeed, Fail, Fail, Again
The explosion of apocalypticism in our "modern" 20th & 21st centuries

To Infinity And Beyond!
A stroll through failed prophecies-to-be

The 'Net Kooks Korner
Wacky prophecies from lone nutters on the 'net

Shop 'till you drop!... or ascend... or something...

It's A Mad, Mad, Mad Max World
Pop-culture visions of the End and the Post-Apocalypse
(Includes the always-updated Apocalyptic Program Guide!)

The Geddon Museum
A Virtual Exhibit of the Apocalyptic Muses
(Note: Graphics intensive, be prepared for longer loading time)

But Wait! There's More!!!
Updates on the nutbars in the news

A Pack O' Links Now
Ten guesses

It Is Written...

Link To Me With Thine URLs
Buttons & banners from my site to yours

They Like Me! They Really, Really Like Me!
Awards my site's won and Webrings I belong to

Everybody's A Prophet
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Alma Geddon, 1999 - 2009